Starting over

I haven't written much the past few weeks. That's because I basically kept "falling off" the diet, getting back into the program for a couple of days, losing it again, and so on. Enough so that for probably a month my weight never got below 225.

It's a real temptation for me, once the weight starts coming back, to admit that the current plan isn't sustainable, it's not going to work long-term, and that once I regain my enthusiasm or find something that works better, or that fits better into my schedule, I'll start over. Until that happens, pound by pound I soon end up back where I was.

I was able to hold those feelings in check this time. Part of the reason was that I find the Atkins plan enjoyable, so I could end up doing one-day-off followed by three-day-on. (I didn't count, but that's what it feels like ended up happening.) As a result I never put on more than five pounds. If I had ever crossed back over the 230 mark, things might have been different.

I've been back on plan for a few days now, and I weigh just a shade over 220. There are a couple of high school graduation parties this weekend, and I really don't want to lose momentum. I'll try really hard to focus on talking with people, and maybe put a couple of bottles of water (and Crystal light:) in the car as emergency rations.

Thank God for Crystal Light

Atkins seems to make me very thirsty. I try to drink no more than one cup of coffee a day, and no more than one or two diet soda's. No juice, no "real" soda, no milkshakes, etc. That doesn't leave much except for water. I like water, but only if it's really cold. But I also get bored by drinking it a couple of times a day.

Here's where Crystal Light and (and similar products, like 4C Totally Light) come to the rescue. At home there's always a quart pitcher in the fridge with the mix, and at the office I have a package with those clever little packets that you pour into a 12/16/20 ounce bottle of water. I drink one or two of those a day. (I buy one bottle at the vending machine and then use it for a few days before recycling it.)

Veins

Around 40 years ago, when I was a child, my mother had varicose veins. She went to the hospital to have them surgically removed. I still remember the poem sister wrote on the get-well card for here: "when it's time to go to the hospital / it's time to say goodbye / when it's time to get your veins pulled out / it's time to say oh my!"

I was on my high school wrestling team. (I was a mediocre wrestler on a good team. Not surprisingly, I could have been better had I weighed less.) During conditioning, we were always impressed by the guys with the bulging veins in the legs and arms that "popped" while they lifted the weights.

Now, as I lose weight, I am seeing more definition in my hands, arms, and legs. The veins in the back of my hands are more visible, and in my legs even more, and disturbingly, so. I don't know if this looks cool, or is an "oh my!" moment.

Clothing

Around the beginning of the month I bought a two new pairs of pants a couple for my business trip. I had lost around 20 pounds, and figured I was going to drop a couple of inches (40 to 38) off my waist. I was disappointed to find that wasn't the case. While my belts were almost at the smallest notch, I just couldn't fit into any smaller size.

Fast-forward to today. I've lost almost 11 more pounds and the new pants are definitely too big -- even after putting them in the dryer to deliberately shrink them. The belts are definitely at the smallest hole. I no longer need 2XL shirts, just XL. I'm pretty broad-shouldered for my frame, so I don't know if a size L will ever work well, but if it doesn't I'd be quite happy for my shoulders to be the real reason, and not an excuse to hide the real truth: my gut was too damn big.

Wow, more than 30 pounds of me are gone forever. That's weird to think about.

Pork rinds

Near the back of the Atkins book I read, he mentions that pork rinds are a good snack to divert yourself away from potato chips and the like. This weekend I bought a pack; everyone in my family was grossed out and nobody would even try one.

I now know why they're a good diversion: it's negative reinforcement, just like the aversion treatment in A Clockwork Orange. I'm gonna tough it out and finish the bag over the next couple of days, but I won't be happy about it.

There's an interesting thread on this over at http://www.lowcarbfriends.com/bbs/atkins-72/490423-pork-rinds-atkins-72-a.html although at times it astounds me. Pork rinds and cream cheese???

Stay out of the house

I worked at home two days last week. That was bad news for the diet.

It is easier for me to stay on-track at work. First, there's the actual work -- it keeps me busy. People often stop by, I'm sitting at my desk on the phone, and so on. Second, the vending and soda machines on my floor don't hold much interest for me.

At home, nobody stops by, and the house has lots of "food" that is very tempting -- cookies, ice cream, bagels, and so on. I tried not to cheat, but it was so easy to get up from the desk, walk to the fridge, and take a "pinch" of something. (Another thing you can't do at work -- colleagues generally frown on you taking bits of their food.)

225; on the fast track, but for how long?

On March 30 I weighed 252; this morning I weighed 225. So for now I'm back to losing around four and a half pounds per week.

It is interesting how much of my outlook depends on what the scale indicates. Since I started I have seen my weight drop almost every day. When it doesn't, I have to take a pause to "explain to myself" that this is common, it doesn't mean anything, and so on. But at some point I'm going to hit a real plateau, or just start slowing down, and I guess I need to start preparing myself for that. I don't want to get depressed and fall off the plan.

Perhaps that's one of the reasons why Atkins recommends moving from Induction to the Ongoing Weight Loss phase, to purposefully slow things down before it happens beyond your control. (I'm sure the major reason to expand the list of things you can eat, so you don't give up out of boredom, but that's not a problem for me yet.)

I should seriously think about going into OWL.